Every parent wants their kids to feel good about themselves and with good reason. Studies have shown that confident kids experience benefits ranging from less anxiety and improved performance in school to increased resilience and healthier relationships.
Here are the nineteen biggest parenting mistakes that crush kids’ confidence:
1. Leaving no room for mistakes
As a parent, you must create a space where your child can make as many mistakes as they can. What you can do instead is ask them to learn from
them.
2. Wanting them to be perfect
Nobody can be perfect. That said, children are still at a developing stage, where they’re supposed to make mistakes. So, avoid being harsh on them.
3. Shutting them out
Never shut your child out. Keep communications open and let your child speak their mind.
4, Not recognizing their efforts
Children try their best to get their parents’ reaction. So do appreciate when they make an effort.
5. Making comparisons
Comparing your child with someone supposedly better is the worst way to treat your kid. It lowers their self-confidence and affects their self-esteem.
6. Blaming them for everything
Never blame your kids for your mistakes and failures. They’re too small to carry that burden.
7. Shaming them for failing
Failure is a part of life. It is something everyone experiences at least once in their lifetime, which is why children should not be shamed for it.
8. Being judgmental
Don’t be the kind of parent, who nags and criticizes their kids for everything. Judging them will only lower their
self-esteem.
9.Invalidating their emotions
You’re making a big mistake if you invalidate your child’s feelings and emotions.
10. Telling them that you’re disappointment
Your child should never be a source of your disappointment. They will make several mistakes, but that doesn’t mean they’re not capable.
11. Demanding maturity
Maturity comes with age. Do not force your child to become mature before they feel up for it.
12. Commenting on their body
Assist your child only when they need it. Do not always be there to help them or they may become to dependable.
13. Taking over their projects
Let your child take responsibility for their work. Do not take over or else it will hamper their confidence when it comes to doing something on their own.
14. Constantly reminding them oftheir mistakes
Parents should avoid bringing back their child’s past mistakes. Neither does it encourage them to perform better, nor does it help boost their confidence.
15. Replacing their dreams with yours
Avoid forcing your dreams and ambitions on your child. Instead allow them to do what they want.
16. Saying ‘I told you so’
Being regretful does not help anyone. Even your kids. That said, saying ‘I told you so’ is therefore not effective at all.
17. Telling them they’re not good enough
Never tell your child they’re not good enough. They’re doing everything they can to thrive.
18. Setting unrealistic expectations
Having expectations from your child is normal, but if you put forward rigid, unrealistic demands, they may face difficulty, which may take a toll on their confidence.
19. Condoning a victim mentality
Saying things like “we can’t afford new shoes like the other kids because we come from a poor background” reinforces to your child that most of life’s circumstances are out of their control.
